Mortal Woman.

Isolated. Secluded. No one to whom I may share my thoughts. No one to whom I may share my pain. No one. Just me. Carrying the pressure placed on me by those who I love. Not intentionally. But because I am the one with the strength. What is strength? I believe it is powered by faith and favor. God has given me an unexplainable amount of strength every since I was a young girl. This strength has carried me through each phase of my life. This strength has prepared me to face what life presents me. This strength allows me to look at my ill father in the face, a face that grows less and less familiar by the day, and not shed a tear. He has been doing well and then in a moment’s time, he is not well. Mentally, he is struggling. I see it, he knows it, but it is not something that he cares to admit. His mental health has a direct impact on his physical health. My solution: Keep him healthy mentally. Maybe the biggest challenge of them all. He is so authoritative, arrogant, and stubborn. I want to protect him, from himself, but I am only human. I am only a woman. There is only so much that my small frame and exhausted mind can bear. I thank God for the positive moments that we share. I thank God for the moments of peace because they allow me to regain the strength that is necessary in low moments similar to the current state. The strength that is necessary to carry the pain and fear of my family.  My question is Lord, while I am taking care of everyone else, where is your gift to me (male or female) on Earth to take care of me. I am worn Lord. Please keeping doing as you always have, giving me strength in the darkest places.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s